Mulattea is a blog written by Skye Haynes. Her posts explore mixed identity, feminism, race, religion, and privilege.

I'm a Yogi (Not the Bear)

I'm a Yogi (Not the Bear)

By the time you’ve read this, I’ve gone to 4 yoga sessions.

Yep, I’m a yoga person now. A yogi.

Geez that couldn’t seem any more pretentious, could it?

In all seriousness though, yoga is awesome.

When we got back from spring break, my awful roommate told me she was thinking of doing yoga on Mondays and Wednesdays at Eppley now, and that I should come with her. (Jk Maggie’s the best.) At the time I was more than skeptical. See, I’m not much of an exercise-y person. I haven’t even gone to Eppley (UMD’s over-the-top gym) at all in my life.

You don’t understand, though.
Eppley is probably the closest non-dorm building to my dorm. We’re talking a one minute walk here, and I still could not bring myself to go in.

Needless to say, working out isn’t my thing. I don’t feel refreshed by the presence of sweat. “Sweat is pain leaving the body,” No. Sweat is sweat and it’s gross and now I’m gross because I’m covered in it. I don’t like the burning feeling of working out. I don’t feel refreshed after hitting the gym, I feel like a microwaved potato.

I think you get the picture now.

I don’t like working out, and Maggie knows that. I wonder if she expected me to say yes. When she asked, my knee jerk response was “NOOOOOOOOO.” But something else told me I should ask around. So of course I asked Carter and Courtney, the only two people besides Maggie and my family I seem to talk about on Mulattea. I have other friends, please believe me. So I asked Courtney and she said something along the lines of, “Yoga is of the devil, don’t do it.” I asked Carter and he, being that annoyingly supportive and amazing person he is, was all, “Go for it! You can do it! You should try!” So I had two different advices and a roommate who's all about new experiences.

Truth be told, I knew it was a yes because I didn’t say no immediately. It’s like when you hit the first snooze when you wake up, you’ve already played yourself.

So I agreed. Maggie was happy, Carter was proud, Courtney was…. Courtney, and I was skeptical.

So the time comes for Yoga. I'm nervous, I'm stressed, I'm basically the opposite of what yoga is as I'm getting ready for it. Of course I was all, "What do I wear? How do I act? What is a downward dog?" 

Maggie and I approached Eppley Recreational Center with our signed Group Fitness contracts in hand, and all I could think about was how I had never been in Eppley before. Going in was like the first New York scene of Elf. Everything was so shiny and modern looking! There's even a smoothie shop that uses KALE in their smoothies! What!

Anyways, we were in yoga. I was amazed with myself. "Skye you're doing it! Look at you being social and fit. Carpe diem! Look at you embracing the college experience! You're so healthy, you're basically a carrot!" You get the gist. We got our mats and laid them out like, "flower petals in a semicircle position," as our yoga instructor said so nicely. It was around that time that I turned to Maggie and said, "I want to be a yoga instructor."

So we begin.... and it's really fun. Our yoga instructor Cynthia decided to shake things up and we did Disney yoga with all the popular songs like "I'll Make a Man Out of You" and "You'll Be In My Heart". If you know me, you know I lowkey died of happiness because I freaking love Disney. It was great.

The class we take is called Yoga Flow, which is described as "a class for all levels of fitness," which probably directly translates to "easy yoga class." 10/10 Do recommend for all people in the world. 

I always thought yoga was just being bendy and holding bendy positions, but it's actually very physical. I've told everyone I know that it's like they trick you into working out. They'll say, "Go into downward dog," which looks like this:


Then they'll say, "Now plank one inch from the mat," like so:

Y'know what that is? A PUSHUP. You don't fool me, yoga. When I realized that, I informed Maggie I changed my mind and don't want to be a yoga instructor.

The class was so much fun though. The instructors are super nice, and extremely encouraging. They give you so much positive reinforcement and tell you that you're strong and can do anything. By the time it's over I feel so relaxed and ready to face the rest of my week. I definitely recommend an easy class for everyone, it's a blast! Here's a picture of some of the group yoga we did last Monday. (That's Sydney by the way)

Moral of the story? Take a page out of Janelle Monae's book and, "let your booty do that yoga!"

Also, donate money to me so I can get socks that match.


Be sure to check out some of my articles over at College Magazine! Things get pretty crazy over there.

Intersectional Feminism and Christianity. Boom.

Intersectional Feminism and Christianity. Boom.

Skye and Carter Take Jamaica (With Pictures!)

Skye and Carter Take Jamaica (With Pictures!)