Mulattea is a blog written by Skye Haynes. Her posts explore mixed identity, feminism, race, religion, and privilege.

Anxiety About a New Semester? Same.

Anxiety About a New Semester? Same.

It started with a thought.

I was thoroughly enjoying my break, living lavish, not worrying about deadlines or homework of any sort, when a random thought popped into my head.

Spring semester starts next week.

All it took was a teeny thought like that to send someone like me spiraling. I’m talking the whole nine yards. I was up late almost every night, panicking. I spent my days obsessing, feeling useless if I wasn’t doing something productive. I’d send those annoying texts to Carter, “Do you think I’ll do well next semester?” I was off the deep end.

Now I’m sitting in my dorm room, I just moved back in today. How am I feeling? Still pretty stressed out. I’m beginning to think this is just how it's going to be.

My first semester was a trip. I was freaked out. I didn’t know what to expect at all. Now, 6 months later, I’m feeling the same exact way! Even though I’ve taken college classes and lived in a dorm room, I find myself getting anxious thinking about classes and living on campus. It’s like I’ve run out of things to worry about, so I’m just repeating my old worries to make sure that I worried about them adequately. I'm also making up new things that I didn't worry about first semester. "What if on the first day of class, I trip and fall in front of everyone?" "What if I get in a fight?" I've never even been in a fight. Why am I worrying about fighting someone? Last night was the zenith of my frustration. I was feeling so down, so unsure of myself, my doubts piled up around me like #Blizzard2016.

That's when the ray of hope appeared.

Last night I accidentally read 1 Peter 5:7. I was supposed to be on a different book of the bible! But my bible app crashed, and I landed on good ol' Peter. When I read the passage, my brain absorbed the words like a sponge. I kept replaying the words, a broken record, reading them over and over. 

1 Peter 5:7
“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

To hear that all of those nagging thoughts and annoying doubts could be cast away (shoutout to Tom Hanks) was so relieving. The tension in my body almost disappeared. I fell asleep almost instantly, and read the words again when I woke up. It was like a bandaid for my soul, almost.

Even if you aren’t religious, just know that holding onto that anxiety, worrying about things that you can’t control, it’s really not worth it. You’re getting yourself all worked up and it isn’t helping at all. Think about it: what does the anxiety do for you? Nothing!

It's not that easy, Skye.

I know. I have some pretty bad anxiety. My chest gets tight, I feel lightheaded- like I can't breathe, and that's when the thoughts come. It's not like i'm magically healed by the bible verse, seeing as I'm still a little worried about class. All I can say is that by thinking positively, you can counteract your anxiety. I heard this tip online: Picture your anxiety as a whiny little kid, and politely tell that little kid to shut it.

"What if I don't wear the right stuff tomorrow????"

"Calm down, you'll be fine."

The key to battling your anxious school thoughts is to respond to your doubts with positive thinking. 

That's all i have for today! Make sure to check out my College Magazine posts. They're awesome! 



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